To Be Significant
by sequinnedmind
Summary: Ginny Weasley, always forgotten amongst her elder brothers. What must be done to get her noticed, perhaps it only takes the bare minimum... Warning: eating disorder, some mild sexual references and alcohol to ensue. Rated T for these reasons.
1. Chapter One

**Disclaimer:** Yes, this story is centered around an eating disorder. If it's a subject you are uncomfortable with/don't like then don't read obviously. There will also most likely be alcohol and sexual references. The story will be canon to the books (It is set during Ginny's fifth year, Half-Blood Prince). Anything you recognize I don't own, however the rest of the plot I do yadda yadda yadda. I hope you enjoy, let me know what you think!

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_The fierce, dark eyes stared back at her. They were repulsed, horrified. Angry, unsatisfied. The urge to scream engulfed her as she turned away from the mirror. She longed to scream and never stop. She picked up her clothes, covering her body, her nails scratching her skin in her haste. She didn't notice, didn't care, she was too livid at herself, her body, her life. Failure._

_Six months earlier_

Ginny smiled hugely as she walked into the bustle of King's Cross. It had been a sad summer; gloom had descended over The Burrow in the aftermath of Sirius's death. She was glad to be getting away from it and took comfort in the bustle of the busy station.

An hour later and the Hogwarts Express was racing on its journey, twisting among green fields under a blue sky. Ginny was snuggled up in a compartment, reunited with Dean. He was prattling on about the Muggle world, things Ginny only vaguely understood from Muggle Studies. She didn't mind, she just listened to his soothing voice dreamily…

She found herself being shaken awake gently by Dean.

"Hey you," he cooed, Ginny grimaced and rubbed her eyes. "You fell asleep, silly! I'm going to find the trolley, you want anything?"

"I'll go, stretch my legs." She smiled before sorting out money and what Dean wanted before setting off. She found the trolley and was returning to Dean, her arms laden with Pumpkin Pasties and Chocolate Frogs when she looked up to find Lavender and Parvati standing out in the corridor staring at her before giggling and returning to their compartment.

After the journey (and the bizarre incident of being invited into Slughorn's compartment) Ginny made her way into the Great Hall once more. A feeling of warmth and comfort spread through her body, she was glad to be here. After the Sorting she dug in gratefully to her dinner, despite eating with Dean and then again with Slughorn, she was starving. Not to be outdone by her brothers, she was used to eating a lot, and she piled her plate high. Halfway through eating her dinner she looked up to find Lavender and Parvati staring at her again. _Ugh, probably desperate to hear about the Department of Mysteries. Then again, Ron, Harry and Neville had all been there too…_ She glanced at the girls curiously again; they were shooting looks at Ginny's plate and whispering. Ginny frowned uncomfortably, seeing that on their plates they only had some chicken and vegetables, which they were pushing around their plates unenthusiastically. _Weird._ She returned to her conversation with Dean, helping herself to substantial portions of the desserts now causing the table to groan.

That night she got ready for bed in the bathroom, and caught a glimpse of herself nude in the mirror. In the Burrow, there were always so many people it was always in and out of the bathroom as quickly as humanly possible. Now she took a good look at herself. Her stomach was holding a definite bulge_. Probably the feast_, she thought. Her face also seemed rounder when she looked; she smiled at her reflection and recoiled in horror when chubby cheeks appeared. She gazed at the mirror in dismay, inspecting her thighs_. I must have put on weight over the holidays_, she thought with growing alarm. _Has nobody noticed?_ Suddenly the image of Parvati and Lavender looking at her and whispering passed through her head. She groaned and quickly put on her pyjamas and climbed into her bed, resolving to drop a few pounds as she dozed off.

The next morning she awoke late as usual and went to shower. She took a deep breath and turned to the corner where the scales resided. Stepping on, the figure stopped at 145*. She gulped, that was an increase of 15 whole pounds since June. For her 5'7" frame, this was well within healthy boundaries but Ginny didn't know that, or feel it. She showered before brushing her teeth, mulling it over in her head. She had always been skinny as a child – she remembered clearly years of being teased mercilessly by her brothers. Always active, taking part in the village's Muggle activities along with walks with her family throughout the countryside and playing Quidditch. Over the last four years away from home, however, she realized if she had been upset, lonely or homesick she had comfort ate. It didn't happen often – her brother's were always around after all, and her parents just an owl away. However, if she was overwhelmed she would head to the kitchens, greedily eating what the house elves gave her whilst they listened to her problems, which were usually pretty trivial.

It looked like the house elves' cooking and well, her own laziness had added up. She didn't find time to exercise, she always had homework. Over the summer Molly Weasley had taken extra care with her cookery, often making more than needed to comfort the group after their ordeal. And although her ankle had been healed in seconds by Madam Pomfrey it still pained her on occasion, particularly if she was taking part in strenuous activity and thus she hadn't been helping around the house as much, taking to lying on her bed reading and eating Chocolate Frogs all summer.

Pulling on her shirt she observed it was noticeably tighter, the buttons strained. She glared at it and pulled her jumper over it, again the jumper was skin tight. She looked in the mirror, the clothes clinging tightly to her curves, it looked revolting. She threw her robes on hurriedly and returned to the mirror to do her hair. She tried smiling again, her lips strained against her teeth and her face looked agonized. She sighed and turned away, picking up her bag and heading down to breakfast.

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*****Sorry if you are used to weight in stones or kilograms but despite being from the UK myself I'm more familiar with just pounds. Bear with me! Maths is good for you anyway, keep the brain young and that. :]

I hope you liked the first chapter, let me know what you think. I know it obviously won't be everyone's cup of tea, be honest. Don't sugarcoat it, but don't flame either. Constructive criticism is always welcome.


	2. Chapter Two

Ginny entered the Great Hall cautiously, wondering if everyone would automatically know about her new diet. Her mind knew that she was being utterly ridiculous, but she couldn't help feeling as though she was holding a new, exhilarating secret. And she liked that feeling. Ginny didn't want people to know about her diet, anyway, in case she failed. She cringed away from the thought and sat down next to the girls from her dorm, who chattering inanely about some new love affair.

Ginny twirled a strand of her long hair whilst glancing at Professor McGonagall impatiently, who was currently organizing the sixth year's timetables. Her stomach growled with hunger, it had been stretched with the huge meal last night. Her mouth filled with saliva as her gaze lowered to the foods spread out in front of her - toast, bacon, eggs, pastries, bagels._ All sure fire way to add to the fat on my legs_, she thought, irritated at her body's lack of control. _It's only food_, she told herself, shifting uncomfortably. Professor McGonagall was _still_ with Neville. _Just a bit of toast then, until McGonagall's here. No need to go overboard. Maybe an apple…? _She bit her lip, contemplating. She didn't know what was right. She was smart enough to know that not eating wasn't healthy, but not educated skilfully enough in weight loss to know _what_ to eat. She looked at what Lavender was eating for guidance in the matter. A small bowl of cereal and an apple. Ginny copied this carefully, pouring water into her goblet in an effort to be like Lavender. With a wistful glance at the croissants, she spooned the plain, non-descript cereal in her mouth and swallowed. Just then McGonagall whirled over to them handing their timetables out and scolding them for not being on their way to class already. _Yeah, like it's our fault she took so long with the sixth years!_ Ginny grumbled to herself, but was secretly glad for an excuse to leave the cereal. Grabbing the apple and her bag, she took off for Charms.

After being lectured about the approaching OWLs all morning, Ginny decided perhaps lunch could be skipped, in favour of going to the library to get a head start on the homework she had been set that morning in Muggle Studies, a subject she had chosen with encouragement from her father. She made her way towards the small section of the library filled with Muggle books and magazines, for those who were Muggle-born, doing Muggle Studies or perhaps just interested in keeping up with the Muggle world. She picked up a few magazines and some parchment and headed towards a secluded desk. She flicked through noncommittally, sighing at the lack of movement from the photos before pausing at a page with titled brightly with the words "Lose six pounds in two weeks with our power-busting workout!" Ginny tilted her head in contemplation before reading the article which consisted in various 'steps' in how to work off the weight. Ginny smiled and copied out the plan onto the parchment as well as sketching copies of the images supplied with the article. Captivated now, she pored over the other magazines scribbling down all the tips and tricks for weight loss she could find.

"What are you still doing here? Classes started five minutes ago!" Madam Pince's sharp voice made Ginny jump.

"Crap! I mean… uh… sorry, lost track of time." She grabbed the parchment and her bag and raced out of the library flying smack bang into Cho Chang. Cho fell backwards dropping her books. Ginny bit her lip, cursing inwardly. _Of_ _course _you_ would knock her over, look at the size of you compared to her. Plus, she's absolutely gorgeous_, a sneering voice in Ginny's head mocked her, a new voice, she wasn't used to this tone... it reminded her of Peeves. She shook herself mentally and helped Cho up, apologizing profusely.

Hermione had asked Ginny to sit with her, Ron and Harry at dinner that evening and Ginny was quick to get to the Great Hall. Her stomach had been rumbling all day resulting in sniggering among classmates. She was hungry, and was intelligent enough to know that not eating_ anything_ was not the way to go about losing weight. _But let's not go crazy_, she reminded herself. The others were not here yet, so she sat down alone and began deciding what to eat. Inspired by some of the tips she had picked up in the library, she poured ice cold water into her goblet before spooning steamed vegetables and grilled fish onto her plate. She smiled at her choice, ignoring the shepherd's pie being sampled by most.

Whilst she was busy congratulating herself the others arrived arguing about some book Harry had been given in Potions, oblivious to her presence at the table. Ginny wasn't really listening - horrified by the amount of food Ron was piling on his plate - but it didn't take long for her to catch the gist of the argument. A book? Instructions from a book? Her stomach swirled uncomfortably.

"Hang on, did I hear right? You're taking instructions from a book?" Harry looked surprised to see her, she had been pretty quiet. He tried telling her that it wasn't like that, but it didn't reassure her. Harry insisted the book was fine despite Hermione's reprisal. Ginny suddenly wasn't hungry anymore.

She returned to the common room after just a few spoonfuls of the vegetables. She was angry now, how could Harry be so _stupid_? _Of course he wouldn't listen to you;_ _you're just stupid, insignificant Ginny Weasley_. She was distracted from the mocking voice in her head by a hand around her waist. She jumped, only to find it was Dean. She hadn't thought about him all day.  
"I looked for you at lunch." He said, smiling at her. _He really likes me. Why does he like me? _She stared at him, stunned for a moment. "..Ginny?" he said, when she didn't reply.

"Oh… um… right, I was at the library, tons of homework. Better get started." She shifted uncomfortably away, she couldn't explain it but she didn't deserve this.

"But it's our first day back!" he called as she walked up the staircase to her dormitory, his face a picture of confusion and worry. She closed the door behind her, leaning against it and taking a big breath. She brushed off the guilt as she took out the pieces of parchment she had filled in the library and began to read through them.

After doing this she rummaged in her bag before finding an empty journal. She folded the parchment and put it in the back for later use before writing the date, her intake of the day and her weight. One of the magazines she had read had told her that writing down what she ate would help. _Taking instructions from a book… but this was hardly the same thing._

The next morning she was headed to breakfast (_It is the most important meal of the day – speeds up your metabolism_ she repeated back to herself internally, quoting yet another magazine) when she was intercepted by Harry.

"Hey Ginny, I was thinking you should try out for Quidditch, you know, you always wanted to play Chaser, right? Katie and Angelina have left, so now's your chance." He grinned down at her. She was startled, he was Quidditch captain; _he_ thought she was good? _No, he's just being polite._

"Oh, um, I hadn't really thought about it. I mean, I guess I could…" she trailed off, not wanting to promise him anything.

"Great! Live up to the Weasley name, eh?" He nudged her cheerfully before being enveloped in a group of fourth years giggling and flicking their hair at him, shooting glares at Ginny. She sighed and looked around the Great Hall. She had many friends, that was no secret, but nobody she was _close _to. No real 'group', she always felt like she was invading. Eventually Dean noticed her and waved her over.

She brushed off Dean's questions of her behaviour the previous night by claiming she had been tired, concentrating on Harry's suggestion. _He asked me to try out? Surely you don't go round _asking_ people to try out? _

"Aren't you hungry?" Dean's voice interrupted her thoughts. "Ginny? Seriously, you've been really vague since we've got back!"  
"Sorry," she muttered, spooning porridge into her bowl along with coffee. _No milk, no sugar. And nothing on my porridge. _That was safe. She knew she wasn't being fair in her treatment of Dean but she had other things to think about. Dean sighed and began talking to Seamus while Ginny ate slowly, shuddering at the bitter taste of the black coffee and the blandness of her porridge. She left it half finished before picking up her bag and standing up. "I really am sorry, Dean, um, we can hang out tonight, okay? After dinner." He smiled and jumped up.

"I'll walk you." He grabbed her hand and they headed out. A jolt of pleasure shot through her as he chattered on again, before leaving her outside Muggle Studies, her cheek tingling from where he'd kissed her. _He deserves better, _the voice said viciously. She sighed once more and headed inside, they were studying fashion.

Ginny emerged from her double lesson, her head swimming with the images of her lesson. _Those models! They were so skinny! _She thought_. Some of them looked gorgeous, but others looked horrible, like skeletons. _She shuddered_; I want to be skinny, but not like that. _All the same, she had noticed their glamour, glamour which reminded her of girls like Cho and Lavender. _I may not be skinny (yet!) but that doesn't mean I can't improve other aspects…_

Hope you enjoyed! These are just a few introductory chapters; the real plot is coming soon.


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